Hola Flat Oeufers

I trust you’ve got over the excitement?  It was quite a special day, wasn’t it?  Certainly one that will last long in my memory.  I’m talking of course about the long-awaited final commencement of the decline and fall of Jose ‘Chewing a Wasp’ Mourinho.  Well, we can hope anyway.

I thought it would be interesting over the coming months to kick off a series of Player Reviews…nothing too exacting necessarily, just a snapshot as to where we see a player in his current development, value and meaning to the team and, perhaps what the future holds.

So Harry Kane, HK10, Kaneinho, OneofOurOwn.

He’s bloody brilliant, eh?  You can’t fault him.  30 goals this season, an improvement on his 29 last year (although in 7 more games).  He scored 7 goals in the CL which, considering the opposition, is a great return.

Harry scored 0.81 goals per match as opposed to Salah’s 0.67.

His shooting accuracy was 41%, whereas Salah’s was 44%

But…..but……one Stat that really stood out for me is Assists:  2   (Salah had 11)

We all know a Striker has to have a selfish streak, but this is one area of his game that he needs to improve.  The sight of Dier (!) throwing his hands up as Kaneinho tried to Cruyff that Leicester defender instead of simply squaring the ball to a better placed teammate (there were others) was emblematic of something we’ve seen quite a few times this season…a tunnel vision that at times damages the team’s chances of scoring important goals.

As to the future for this ‘Spurs man through and through’, I believe we have at least 2 more seasons to start winning things before HK might start to consider whether he may have to move to fulfil all his ambitions.

But what do you think of him?  Am I being over-critical, or is this a flaw that needs ironing out?

Author: Flat Oeuf

A blog dedicated to aficionados of the chicken badge of Tottenham Hotspur FC, unashamedly revelling in the agony and ecstasy of every moment of every matter who finds themselves fortunate enough, in any given season, to be the stewards, manager or players of the best club in the world. COYFS!

  • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 1:01 pm

    All fair comments to be sure, but on the assist stat, does the fact pooh play with a front 3, and break (counter attack) faster than we do have any bearing on the opportunity to provide assists? Justa fort.
    I will also say, that I felt Kane didn’t score the variety of goals he did in the previous season (more tap in’s this season), whether that was down to the opposition I’m not sure, but the winner against Leicester t’other day was more reminiscent of the variety of goals he’s capable of scoring, am I being overly critical?

  • 61SpursNut 20/05/2018 at 1:07 pm

    Is that the same Harry kane who “is” a product of your yoof academy?

    • 61SpursNut 20/05/2018 at 1:08 pm

      When I say “your”, I do of course mean “our”.

      • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 1:17 pm

        We have a yoof academy?! When did that happen…

        • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 1:23 pm

          Around the time that the law was passed allowing ENIC to harvest the souls of young children.

      • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 2:02 pm

        This “he’d have been a success regardless of the Academy” non-argument is a particularly trite load of old tosh. First of all, EVERY top player is so more as a result of their own hard work and natural talent than the influences around him.

        And secondly, had we not had an Academy in the first place Harry Kane most definitely would NOT be a Tottenham player right now.

  • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 1:12 pm

    In terms of variety the stats show that HK is scoring a good balance with both feet and his head (LF: 10; RF: 13; Head: 6)…Salah was LF 27; RF 5; H 2 for example.

    You may well be right about outside the box/inside the box; and as for the different set-ups of the two teams, that will certainly have an effect although I don’t see HK as playing a traditional No. 9 role.

    • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 1:24 pm

      I would also add, the teams slow paced attack has also had an effect on the type of opportunities created for Kane. Space has been hard to find in and around the box with opposing teams sitting deep, it seems quite remarkable that Kane managed to scored 30 goals.

      • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 1:26 pm

        That is absolutely true, he’s working in incredibly tight spaces.

  • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 1:50 pm

    What am I doing wrong, or haven’t done yet?
    I am still having to fill in my deets everytime I open the blog, or refresh the page. My wordpress account is always logged into, I am using google chrome, so I am unsure as to what else I can do to resolve it.
    Any ideas peeps?

    • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 3:06 pm

      Let me check it out later, there is a box to tick or untick, I’m sure

      • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 3:27 pm

        Cheers bud.👍

      • McG ⚽⚽ 20/05/2018 at 3:27 pm

        Can you ask the internet gods why I can’t post a gif either, while you’re at it please?!

        • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 4:08 pm

          I’m not sure why as it seems others (including me) are now able to…

  • Ronwol1960-61🕎⚽🎷🎥 20/05/2018 at 1:51 pm

    In the beginning,at the start of the Poch era, the intensity of Kane was the first thing that shone through.
    He was part of the team but that was no going to stop Kane. While most of them were prancing about,it was Kane who took the game on. The more I saw him take on the game the more frustrated I was with the others,but he bought Poch the respect and licence as he was out on his own winning and saving games from the off. We had lost Bale and Modric had a few learning years with AVB and Timwit and was getting our team and working it arond a stronger defence and some kids running up front….but it was Kane that gave us the results.
    Kane was our Berbatov at that moment. Something we could hold on to as a focus and Kane took it on his own.
    Eriksen was always good at some things,but never really took it on until the past year and a bit. Kane on the other hand took the team on his shoulders.

    Kane has gone though some injuries and fought through,some frustrating spells and come through and kept his head. Kane is a player with humility and it serves him well.He hasnt got bigger than himself so has kept a level head. But he wants more Im sure and frankly deserves more. So along with Pochs standing tall vrs Levy,Kane should do the same. We know who Kane is. We need to know who Levy is. If Poch and Kane stand tall. We will find out who Levy is and we need to. We are in the same boat as them. We want the best for us and our club. Levy and Jo have a business to run. They need to feel the pressure of the fans and players.

    Kane has weight as does Poch.

  • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 2:06 pm

    I agree with most of what you’ve written, Flatty, save for one main point: I believe that Harry Kane would rather win one League or Champions League title with us than he would a hatful with another club.

    I think he has his eyes firmly set on being a Tottenham legend; the greatest goalscorer the club has ever seen and he’ll not achieve that aim by moving away.

    So long as we continue to improve he’ll remain with us. And all the indications are we’re doing just that.

    I genuinely think he’ll be that rare beast: a modern-day one-club player.

    • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 2:19 pm

      Shouldn’t that be ‘a modern day – one club player’? Just askin.

      • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 3:00 pm


        • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 3:00 pm


        • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 3:11 pm

          The terms ‘modern day’ and ‘one club’ are both compound adjectives used to describe the word ‘player’ and as such each adopt a hyphen to avoid confusion.

          The exception to this rule is when an adverb is employed as part of the compound as it’s obvious what it relates to.

          As in “Yesterday’s cup final was a dreadfully dull affair”.

          • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 3:12 pm


            • 61SpursNut 20/05/2018 at 3:14 pm

              Kyle Walker-Peters

          • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 3:15 pm

            Terms such as ‘compound adjectives’ is exactly why English can/is an enigma to me, that phrase means nothing to me as I can’t visualise it i.e. in 3D as I would thinking of a tree’s anatomy for example. I read it as I see it, so the way you’ve written it appears odd to me. 👍

    • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 4:10 pm

      I agree Taff that HK wants to stay, and wants an illustrious career with us. I feel his ambition could take him abroad though, if it looked like we weren’t fulfilling the promise we’re showing now.

      • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 4:22 pm

        Hopefully that’s something that’ll never be put to the test.

        • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 4:23 pm

          Bien sur , Taff

  • Ronwol1960-61🕎⚽🎷🎥 20/05/2018 at 2:10 pm

    We have a strange style. When it works it works.When it doesnt,it doesnt.
    We are fantastic on the counter and also from pressing in mid and when those things hapen the field is wide open and we maraud with speed and power. Thats when we are attacking at our best. Give us some space and we are dynamic,take away the space and we are deadheads.

    We see when we move the ball up on our own and dont do it quickly our attackers suffer the frustration of not getting the service needed.
    Two ways that can hapen in that scenerio. We can physically get stuck in through the middle or we can finesse it in as Eriksen often does. But the slower the build up the more jammed it is,the more times Kane is stuck alone,covered.

    When Kane wasnt playing it brought out greater ingenuity with the other players.they would dart about taking all of the different roles. What happened was great fluidity.
    If we can only learn from that.

    Moura.Moura is a ball player.He can dribble. He and Eriksen can create as they are both a good at finding space. They need more time playing together. There isnt enough of a sustained offensive game using our ingenuity and quality.Its more of a pressure game.This works with the counter but not with a slow build up. We try to go around. We pass to midfield and then out to the wings and what happens? the crosses are terrible and only Kane who can nut it. So we try hard low balls in and sometimes they work and somethimes they dont.

    Change this key and Kane becaosme the greatest goalscorer ever. Dont and we lose him

  • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 2:23 pm

    Yay! Stadium update with pics.
    Shop and TE external cladding being installed, looks a tad dark to me, natural corten steel would have given it a nice finish, but wodoo I know….

    • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 2:28 pm

      Just to clarify, this is a building clad with corten steel, I personally think it has a nicer lighter, warmer appearence.

      • 61SpursNut 20/05/2018 at 3:15 pm

        That has it’s place … and it’s already there.

        • 61SpursNut 20/05/2018 at 3:17 pm

          Please excuse the superfluous apostrophe.

          • Ronwol1960-61🕎⚽🎷🎥 20/05/2018 at 3:21 pm

            Youve underscored that nut

          • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 3:24 pm

            Ron asked me if I could ask you if he borrow your superfluous apostrophe
            (punctuation to be added by reader wherever appropriate)

            • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 3:24 pm


        • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 3:21 pm

          Your facade doesn’t foole me…

      • McG ⚽⚽ 20/05/2018 at 3:33 pm

        It looks rusty & shit.

        • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 3:40 pm

          You’re dead to me…

          • McG ⚽⚽ 20/05/2018 at 3:44 pm


      • SpurAndy 21/05/2018 at 11:41 am

        Assuming that pic isn’t Tottenham high road. If it is I’m concerned about the tectonic plates shifting causing mountains to rise in the distance.

  • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 4:03 pm


    What am I doing wrong, or haven’t done yet?
    I am still having to fill in my deets everytime I open the blog, or refresh the page. My wordpress account is always logged into, I am using google chrome, so I am unsure as to what else I can do to resolve it.
    Any ideas peeps?

    Cas and everyone, please give commenting a go now. I’ve changed the setting but it might that everyone needs to be ‘logged in’ to comment. If so, I will open it up further. Just trying to avoid Spam.

    • 61SpursNut 20/05/2018 at 4:15 pm

      • 61SpursNut 20/05/2018 at 4:15 pm

        I find that works as an alternative.

    • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 4:23 pm

      Ah, I did say I doughnut understand Oinglish..

      • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 4:24 pm

        OK that didn’t quite work….one sec

        • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 4:25 pm

          Have another go, Cas

          • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 4:26 pm

            Suggest you refresh first before trying to post, though

            • Anonymous 20/05/2018 at 4:32 pm

              I tried that below, and still found my deets missing, hence the post from Anonymous (moi).

    • SpurAndy 21/05/2018 at 11:47 am

      Mr Oeuf I am currently receiving everything tickety boo on my android phone so on that basis I don’t see any need for further work by your good self.

  • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 4:20 pm

    Cheers Oeuf, but nothing has changed, I still have to re – do – my – deets – everytime I – open the – blog – refresh – or click – on a – link.
    Buggerd if I know what to do, fakky compooterz!

    • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 4:21 pm

      Reply to me once more…

      • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 4:23 pm

        I’ve just approved that last comment, that’s meant to mean you can just post away now..

        • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 4:25 pm

          Are you sure you haven’t installed some kind of quality filter?

          I’m having no trouble at all this end.


        • Anonymous 20/05/2018 at 4:27 pm

          Cheers for trying Oeuf, no change, I fear this is beyond my luddite compooter knowledge.

          • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 4:41 pm

            I think if you send an email to:
   they should be able to fix it. I’ve found them to be very good. I will send one at my end too.

    • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 5:32 pm


      • McG ⚽⚽ 20/05/2018 at 5:35 pm

        I was hoping that was gonna be a permanent refusal 🙁

  • McG ⚽⚽ 20/05/2018 at 5:36 pm

    • McG ⚽⚽ 20/05/2018 at 5:37 pm

      Oh dear..

  • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 7:06 pm

    Gareth Southgate, the english Manager of England is looking to ‘feed off’ a core of english players when he chooses his team to play for England in the World Cup.

    • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 7:12 pm

      He’s hoping we’ll make it all the way to the group stages…

      • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 7:22 pm

        I think we’ll surprise a few people. I’d be even more optimistic about our chances if he would just drop Sterling and play Rashford instead.

        • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 7:33 pm

          I think Rashford’s confidence is shot, thanks in large part to moaninho’s antics, maybe England will be a breath of fresh air in comparison.

          • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 7:54 pm

            Under van Gaal Rashford was the hottest young prospect in the game (after Kane, of course). It’s incredible to think just how much he’s gone backwards under Mourinho. He might well be Utd through and through, but I think he desperately needs a change of scenery (or manager) to revive his stagnating career.

            And we’d have to be at the very top of the list of potential suitors.

      • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 7:45 pm

        Well with English players playing for England, I don’t see how we can fail to play 3 games in the Group stages.

        • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 7:51 pm

          Ah. The penny drops…

          • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 8:03 pm

            I’ve just been informed by email that you “Like” this comment.

            Which is weird because I can’t see the “Like” option on my PC.

            Not that that’s an issue as far as I’m concerned … just thought you might like to know.

            • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 8:10 pm

              It’s an option in the App when you click on Notifications (bottom right)

              • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 8:17 pm

                App? On a PC … ?

                • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 8:21 pm

                  …running Windows 7?

                  • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 8:27 pm

                    No on Apple Mac, iPad or iPhone

  • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 7:52 pm

    Time for a bit of Lazio v Inter.
    I’ll provide a match report on joao cancel, if he plays…

    • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 7:53 pm


      • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 7:55 pm

        Maybe Savic as well, although the streams a tad blurry..

  • McG ⚽⚽ 20/05/2018 at 8:36 pm

    I’ve just taken a look at England’s midfield options for the world cup, we look awefully light. Sess deserved a place ahead of Loftus-Cheek if you ask me. One young hungry unknown out on the wing might have been just what the doctor ordered. Deli, Stirling Kane & Vardy are gonna have to have absolute blinders, & not get injured for us to come anywhere half decent..

  • Anonymous 20/05/2018 at 8:37 pm

    That were a cracking first half there Grommit..

  • UnkleTaff 20/05/2018 at 8:56 pm

    I bet Alan Shearer (who is, I think, the contemporary striker that Kane most closely resembles) didn’t have too many assists to his name by the end of his career.

    Hopefully the incident you cited in the Leicester game was no more than an immature Golden Boot-chasing act that he’ll grow out of. I’ve certainly seen him pass to more favourably positioned teammates in the past.

    And I’m sure we’re all agreed that if we were to be offered a 30-goal, 2-assist Kane at the end of next season we’d take that like a shot.

    • SpurAndy 20/05/2018 at 9:00 pm

      I can still partially remember that stunning cross from the wing he made to Dele (I think) against someone.

      • Anonymous 20/05/2018 at 9:43 pm

        It was to Son who headed it in if memory serves, the game might have been against Huddersfield not sure though.

      • Flat Oeuf 20/05/2018 at 9:46 pm

        Yeah! He should do that more.

  • Caspurs 20/05/2018 at 9:53 pm

    Now that was a great game with Lazio stealing defeat from the jaws of victory, where have I seen that before???
    Milinković-Savić ? Well he is a class act to be sure.
    João Cancelo? For a start he can take a throw in (not bad), has electric pace and good dribbling skills, sadly Inter will no doubt take up their option to buy him now they’ve secured CL football.

  • SpurAndy 21/05/2018 at 8:50 am

    Morning Ouefers, today I am mainly chortling.

    • Flat Oeuf 21/05/2018 at 9:07 am

      Just a bit of fun.

      • SpurAndy 21/05/2018 at 9:08 am

        Thanks, it made me larf👍

  • UnkleTaff 21/05/2018 at 9:35 am

    Sixteen. Every five-times and upwards winner … after that, not so good…

    • SpurAndy 21/05/2018 at 9:50 am


      • UnkleTaff 21/05/2018 at 9:55 am

        • Flat Oeuf 21/05/2018 at 10:02 am

          Ohhhh, you like a gif once in a while then?

        • SpurAndy 21/05/2018 at 10:17 am

  • Come and have a go if you think you’re hard enoeuf

    Threaded commenting powered by interconnect/it code.