And Now For Something Completely Different

Image result for and now for something completely different

 

Oeufers, I’ve got a confession. Hartley’s not going to like it one bit.

I can be a rather emotional guy, with a tendency to blubber at moments of extreme joy.

This has proved quite embarrassing over the years, it’s something I struggle to control even in public (my kids school plays are impossible to get through), and it isn’t even limited to my own joy. Movies, music, books or articles, bloody TV adverts, sometimes I cannot physically hold it back.

Why the hell am I telling you this? A football blog, frequented exclusively by blokes (+ Spursy), with a tendency towards blokish humour and medium/medium rare banter?

It’s because I’m having one of those moments right now, a moment of pure pride, knowing that I’m just about to tell you chaps about my son, Jay.

The first 18 months of Jay’s life passed as any parent would expect. Milestones such as playing with toys, crawling, walking, all passed in what would be considered “normal” timescales. We then gradually developed areas of concern, no direct eye contact, no inclination to play with other children or socialise, and no speech development. In fact, many of the sounds that he would make in his first year or so were disappearing, and he became virtually mute.

It took over two years of tests, hospital and specialists visits, and a hell of a lot of chasing and pushing before it was finally confirmed what we already knew, Jay was on the range of neurodevelopmental disorders known as the autistic spectrum, and was at that time considered to be towards the upper end of that range in terms of complexity. There were no answers to our questions on development from that point, it really was unknown as to whether Jay would ever speak or even interact in anything other than a very basic way.

At that time there was a big push towards inclusion across the public sector for those in minorities, including the mentally and physically disabled. It was suggested to us that the best education for Jay would be a mainstream primary school, and it seemed the right thing to do. We felt like maybe being in a setting where other children communicate, it would encourage Jay to do the same.

Over the next five years, there were modest but precious improvements in his communication and social awareness. He slowly started to speak, mostly because of the TV. It worked for him, he was captivated and attentive, especially cartoons, and he started to repeat words, even developing a slight American twang which he still has to this day.

But school wasn’t easy for him. He had a one-on-one helper in the classroom at all times, and the school made great efforts to include and integrate him, but he showed little inclination to engage the curriculum, or the attention of other children. He also developed issues such as instances of hitting or biting, sensory overloads, and physical habits such as high pitched noises and flapping arms.

When it came to secondary school we had serious concerns about him continuing in mainstream schooling, and after a battle, managed to get him a place at a highly rated specialist school called Thriftwood.

We knew immediately that it was the right place for Jay. There were children with a wide variety of disorders, some much more complex than Jay’s, but it was evident that every child and every member of staff were engaging.

He flourished.

He became engaged in subject matter in the classroom, realised the need to learn to read and write, and very quickly used his voice to question and express to such an extent that he’d get in trouble for talking too much. By the time he left, he had a GSCE in both English and Maths, had developed a keen interest in computers, and even sung a solo for his school choir at Chelmsford Cathedral in front of two hundred people, passionately, at the top of his voice (uncontrollable blubbering, obvs).

Jay is now nineteen, a man. He is just about to start his BTEC Level 3 in creative digital media production, having passed level 2 with a distinction. He gets himself up and ready in the morning, walks 20 minutes to the train station, gets a 45 minute train to Liverpool Street, then has a 10 minute bus journey to his college. At one point, I never imagined he’d be able to cross the road without a responsible adult.

He works hard at everything he does, whether that is college work, the videos he makes for YouTube, or especially in the last two years, a passion for writing stories.

Around eighteen months ago, Jay wanted me to read a story he had written. He was quite certain that at 98 pages it wasn’t a novel, more a novella. Quite quickly, I couldn’t believe what I was reading.

It wasn’t so much the quality of grammar, Jay writes as he talks, in sometimes broken English that struggles with tense and participle, it was the detail and the descriptive manner in which he wrote that was so unrecognisable.

Jay’s disorder means that his brain works quite differently to ours. He has learnt ways to communicate, but in all honesty, it is in most cases to discuss only subject matters that are of interest to him. We generally talk about movies, tv shows, his college work, but he would never engage in a meaningful conversation about, say, how my day was at work, or what I did on holiday. A relationship with Jay, although no less fulfilling than any other, can be mostly a one way thing in terms of content choice! Most of the empathy he has is learned behaviour rather than natural. In some ways I consider him very lucky, he suffers far less emotionally than any of us. He knows jubilation, happiness, sadness, and sometimes anger, but he doesn’t share our ability to feel guilt, to be deeply hurt by words or actions of others, or any notion of inadequacy or pressure to conform. He will most likely never have a wife or children, or what we would consider to be close friends, but will also never understand our need to have a partner, or children, or close friends, to have the affection of others, so it is no loss to him.

But I was reading a book that described the feelings and emotions of it’s characters in quite poetic detail, that developed relationships between those characters, that asked questions of morality and values, and contained writing that in some instances tackled theoretical scientific subjects.

It was hard work editing it to a point that is was easily readable, we took great care in trying not to change much of the content so it was still Jay’s words, but as grammatically correct as my capabilities allowed. Six months of long, tough sessions later, it was done.

I didn’t do much else after that, I didn’t get a chance. Jay sent copies of his manuscript to several publishers, and started writing both a sequel and a spin-off (Star Wars inspired).

Around three months later, he calls and says he has received a contract offer from a publisher. Crikey.

Jay came to mine the following day and eagerly watched me as I read the contract. I was immediately sceptical. It was a hybrid publishing contract, meaning it required a contribution from the author towards the cost of publishing. On further reading there were areas I was uncomfortable with. Although it committed to a programme from editing to marketing to publication, it gave little in the way of actual financial commitment in those stages. The royalties seemed unfairly weighed in the publishers favour to my untrained eye, and the ability for the author to block editorial or content changes once the contract was signed wasn’t entirely clear. Further due diligence of both the publisher and the contract type threw up mixed results, with some bad news stories and some good.

I explained my concerns to Jay and he understood, but was unperturbed. He wrote the publishers an email detailing all areas that he/I was unhappy with in the contract, asking them to clarify. A series of emails between them then ensued, and reassurances were verbally given, but I didn’t expect it to go anywhere. Then a revised contract arrived, and it was much more promising. The author contribution to costs was reduced, royalties changed favourably for Jay, and most importantly for me, a commitment in terms of minimal number of copies printed and advertising/marketing investment within the contract from the publishers which proved that it was very much a joint financial commitment.

I discussed this in detail with Jay, as you can imagine he was excited, but we decided at that point to bide our time, send the manuscript to more traditional publishers and literary agents, and see what happens.

Just a few weeks ago, the publishers called Jay and I spoke to them too. I was very impressed with what they had to say, their views on the content of the book, and their plans to take it forward if Jay were to come on board. We did, however, make it clear that Jay was considering his options at that point, and had sent the manuscript to other publishers. Within 2 days, Jay received another revised contract, this time with a further reduced author contribution, higher royalties, and a commitment to investment by the publishers that dwarfed the requested author contribution.

And now Jay has decided that he would like to take up their offer, and I fully support him.

And that’s the reason why I’ve opened up to you all, poured my girly heart out and shared my story.

Yesterday, my other son created a “gofundme” page for Jay, to help raise the £1,600.00 contribution to publishing required, as per below link:

https://www.gofundme.com/publishing-039the-mariverse039-book

Please know that there is no expectation from me for you guys to help. This isn’t going to a charity, and if you don’t feel comfortable or are unable to spare anything I completely understand. There is no obligation based purely on your friendship with me.

But if you want to, and can help, even with a small amount, both myself and Jay would be eternally grateful.

Crikey, that’s a long read. Thanks for your time. Have a bloody lovely day.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Comments
  • HD 🇺🇸 16/08/2018 at 3:06 pm

    I am blubbering. What a marvelous story. I will be partaking. Congrats Fofty, Jay and family.

    • foeorfreund 16/08/2018 at 3:15 pm

      You are a wonderful man, Dawg. Many thanks ;-D

  • TCY 16/08/2018 at 3:35 pm

    Count me in. I mist up instead of blubbering, but I am definitely misting. Congrats to you FOF, Jay and the whole family.

    • foeorfreund 16/08/2018 at 3:47 pm

      Top man, TC! Thank you.

  • SpurAndy 🍒 🥧 16/08/2018 at 3:38 pm

    Fofty, that was a fantastic read in its own right and really appreciate you sharing with us. Without trying to state the bleedin obvs, real situations like your sons puts everything else into its rightful perspective. I’ll be more than happy to pop something into the fund mate.

    • foeorfreund 16/08/2018 at 3:50 pm

      Thanks rAndy, much appreciated.
      I hope it doesn’t come across as a sob story, Jay has always been one of the happiest people I’ve ever known, and the joy he has brought me over the years cannot be measured.

  • ronwol196061 16/08/2018 at 4:19 pm

    I have a case of the Martin Chivers down my spine FoF.
    And you kept all this in wow!!
    I’ve always believed that autistic kids have something very strong inside and they often can’t communicate the intensity of their feelings.
    We understand how many great songwriters have been blind. There us something deep within to express.
    Thanks for sharing FoF I’m happy to do my bit
    Best wishes to you and your family on a real victory

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 7:01 pm

      Honesty Ron, his school was incredible. Full of amazing kids with quite severe issues, but all achieving and moving on in life, and all integrating with the community.
      Thank you so much for your wishes xx

  • Danspurs 16/08/2018 at 5:02 pm

    That’s a great post to read, FoF. Thanks for sharing. I’ll definitely chip in and really hope you hit the target. I’ve been published myself through a slush pile submission and have helped a few other unpublished writers with putting theirs together, both through teaching at conferences and through a blog I used to run, and a few of them got deals after we worked on their cover letters and synopses. I don’t know enough about hybrid publishing to say whether your son is getting a good deal, but if you and he want me to look at what he has been sending out to publishers I’d be happy to. There are quite often a few simple tweaks which give you a better chance of being taken seriously and he could carry on sending to publishers who won’t charge while waiting for the go fund me to hit the target.
    No worries if not though, and good luck again.

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 7:03 pm

      Thanks Dan, that’s much appreciated, and any help we can get will be gratefully received. If you are happy for me to look at your email address via the blog admin, I’ll get in touch?

      • Danspurs 16/08/2018 at 7:30 pm

        Yes definitely. Look forward to hearing from you.

  • Hartley 16/08/2018 at 5:19 pm

    I didn’t get where I am today by crying, it sounds like Jay didn’t either. Nice read Fofty and all the best to you and your family and tell Jay not to forget about the rest of us when the royalties start rolling in.

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 7:05 pm

      Thanks you so much Harts, you’re the best bastard I know 👊🏻👊🏻.
      I’ll make sure to keep you and everyone else updated with his progress.

      • Fat Bertha 16/08/2018 at 7:26 pm

        Careful, you’ll make his eyes go red and watery.

        • Fat Bertha 16/08/2018 at 8:07 pm

          Oops. Not red … pink, maybe.

          • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 9:15 pm

            Don’t try to make out like you’re not a grade A diamond of a bloke too, Fatty. 👊🏻

  • SeattleSpursGuy 16/08/2018 at 5:48 pm

    Sensational!

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 7:06 pm

      All of you guys are, for sure!

  • McG ⚽⚽ 16/08/2018 at 6:11 pm

    Lovely stuff Foe, does he like footy?! Will make a contribution.

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 7:07 pm

      He hates all sports, but supports Tottenham for my sake 🤣.
      Thanks G 👍👍👍👍👍

      • stevo1987 16/08/2018 at 9:49 pm

        I have two sons. None of them are into football and I tried so hard with the youngest. He got to high school and that was it. Really gutted…

        • Fat Bertha 16/08/2018 at 10:20 pm

          If you’re still looking for a son who has a nominal interest in football my dad’s got one you could probably borrow. What’s the pocket money like?

          • 61 Spurs Nut 🌰 16/08/2018 at 10:21 pm

            Damp.

  • AntSpurs 16/08/2018 at 7:07 pm

    Blimey Fofs, it only takes Finding Nemo or similar to get me going and then there’s this. You’ve got a real talent and fighter on your hands there mate , congrats to Jay, you Mrs and family for knocking the ball out the park. Would love to help. Braddock for a couple of weeks but will be more than happy to chop in on payday in a couple of weeks. Huuuuzaaah.

    • AntSpurs 16/08/2018 at 7:07 pm

      Brassick

      • AntSpurs 16/08/2018 at 7:07 pm

        chip in damn it

    • Fat Bertha 16/08/2018 at 7:17 pm

      What are you doing for work Antyboy, if I may be so bold as to ask.

      • AntSpurs 16/08/2018 at 7:19 pm

        Wotcha Spurties, I’m on the game you knows. Pays well, unsociable hours though.

        • AntSpurs 16/08/2018 at 7:23 pm

          No, I’m caring for a pal/brother with MS. Personal care, Chef, PA, Admin, Researcher, Punch Bag, Entertainer. Quite a few strings to this bow required .

          • AntSpurs 16/08/2018 at 7:27 pm

            How’s the job hunting going for yours?

            • AntSpurs 16/08/2018 at 7:29 pm

              Yous ?

              • Fat Bertha 16/08/2018 at 8:06 pm

                I haven’t really got started yet but the enquiries I have made suggest the process could be tough. Cheers.

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 9:16 pm

      Thanks Ant, much appreciated. Youdaman.

  • 61 Spurs Nut 🌰 16/08/2018 at 7:34 pm

    What a marvellously inspiring read FoeuF.
    I shall open my dusty wallet for sure and look forward to reading the tome.

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 9:17 pm

      I’ll make sure to get a copy to you, you absolute diamond 💎

  • Superspoz 🏆 16/08/2018 at 7:35 pm

    Good stuff Fofty. You must be walking on the clouds. What a reward. As you know I’ve a similar situation with my 6 year old (7 on the 28th). Good to know there are dedicated people around to help especially with all the cuts and the strain modern teachers are under.
    Blooming marvellous 👊

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 9:21 pm

      Damn right Spoz, it’s been a pretty great day, made better by the legends I share this place with.
      And as before, if you ever need any advice or a general chat, just ask.

      • Fat Bertha 16/08/2018 at 10:18 pm

        Advice? Er… okay… So, I’ve got this bag, well, it’s more of a sack really, or a pouch maybe, in which I keep my familes valuables…

        • McG ⚽⚽ 17/08/2018 at 12:03 am

          I’m guessing it’s covered in cobwebs?

      • Superspoz 🏆 16/08/2018 at 11:30 pm

        Will do mate thanks 👍.

  • DAVID 16/08/2018 at 8:16 pm

    Great work FOF, hope the book is a huge success, obviously been a long road but what a result.

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 9:23 pm

      Thanks Big D, so do I! Either way, I know he’s going to be ok 👍

  • Sniper 16/08/2018 at 8:49 pm

    Wow Fofty, what an awesome tale! Brilliant!
    I’m sure many of us have their own tales to tell. It puts life and football into perspective. There are much more important matters out there, but Spurs give us all an escape valve.
    I hope that Jay continues to succeed and his follow-up tomes are numerous and widely read!

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 9:27 pm

      Nice one Snipes, it sure does help give perspective. Good man 👍

  • GDawg 16/08/2018 at 9:12 pm

    What a brilliant story FoF. Your boy has come a long way! You must be immensely proud of Jay, next stop is the best seller’s list 😁

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 9:28 pm

      Thanks GDawg, it has been an honour to share it with you all.

  • stevo1987 16/08/2018 at 9:29 pm

    I can tell you about my son if anyone is interested. He is at home with us this week and he is 23……. He is similar to Jay. FoF you can mail if you want to share experiences.

    • Freund or Foe 16/08/2018 at 9:32 pm

      Love to hear it mate.
      And I’ll grab your email from the blog admin, if that’s ok?

      • stevo1987 16/08/2018 at 9:37 pm

        Sure…

  • stevo1987 16/08/2018 at 9:59 pm

    Anyway, I’d just like to say…… I know this is a footy blog and that’s why we are here. But I think it’s a bit bit more than that other place where people can come together with a common interest and sort of be friendly… friends even. I think it’s a good thing. I (think) I have even commented more on the footy on this blog than elsewhere because it’s a friendly place to be. It doesn’t mean we don’t have disagreements as everyone is entitled to their point of view. but the vitriol spewed elsewhere really did for me tbh.

    • DAVID 16/08/2018 at 10:01 pm

      Well said Stevo.

      • stevo1987 16/08/2018 at 10:02 pm

        Oh..thanks DAVID. 🙂

        • Sniper 16/08/2018 at 10:07 pm

          I beg to differ…..

      • Fat Bertha 16/08/2018 at 10:08 pm

        Well said big D for saying “Well said” to Stevo.

        • McG ⚽⚽ 16/08/2018 at 10:11 pm

          Plus none, bar one.

          • Sniper 16/08/2018 at 10:16 pm

            J’taime .. moi non plus

        • Hartley 16/08/2018 at 10:26 pm

          Well said Fats for saying “Well said” to big D for saying “Well said” to Stevo.
          I have no shame.

          • Sniper 16/08/2018 at 10:29 pm

            So what are you trying to say?

          • 61 Spurs Nut 🌰 16/08/2018 at 10:29 pm

            “Well”, said Nut.

  • stevo1987 16/08/2018 at 10:32 pm

    Ah..fack it. I give up. DML here I come 😉

  • Matt 16/08/2018 at 10:50 pm

    That was truly uplifting. I have 19 year old twins. Like any dad I’m proud of them. Neither of them are published! Your lad and his dad should be proud. I’ll be chipping in. And telling my two to get their fingers out!

  • Syd 16/08/2018 at 10:55 pm

    FoF ya bastard you have ruined my day. I can’t stop welling up in the old eyeballs. Congratulations on a beautiful story and obviously a lovely human being as a son. It seems he is more of a gift to you and the family . A great story my friend and happy to help

    • stevo1987 16/08/2018 at 11:56 pm

      I could only get past the first couple of paragraphs tbh.

      • Syd 17/08/2018 at 12:37 am

        I struggled through it. I’ll have a few tears if Toby goes as well but not as many

  • Superspoz 🏆 16/08/2018 at 11:39 pm

    Since the subject is our children. Something has to be done at these “arcades” at these family resorts for the great unwashed. Those 2 penny machines where the trays slide back and forth are NOT “a bit of fun”, they’re evil. My three are already addicted. It’s conveniently placed so you have to walk through it to get anywhere. And just like all the casinos, there are no clocks on the wall and the aircon is on overdrive. I f@kin hate these places.

  • Fat Bertha 16/08/2018 at 11:55 pm

    Hartley

    Well said Fats for saying “Well said” to big D for saying “Well said” to Stevo.
    I have no shame.

    There’s no shame in admitting that you have no shame.

    • McG ⚽⚽ 17/08/2018 at 12:01 am

      That’s the real shame.

      • Sniper 17/08/2018 at 12:40 am

        Shame on you!

        • Hartley 17/08/2018 at 1:35 am

          You are shamewasting, which is a shame.

          • Fat Bertha 17/08/2018 at 1:42 am

  • Ronwol1960-61🕎⚽🎷🎥 17/08/2018 at 12:57 am

    stevo1987
    Anyway, I’d just like to say…… I know this is a footy blog and that’s why we are here. But I think it’s a bit bit more than that other place where people can come together with a common interest and sort of be friendly… friends even. I think it’s a good thing. I (think) I have even commented more on the footy on this blog than elsewhere because it’s a friendly place to be. It doesn’t mean we don’t have disagreements as everyone is entitled to their point of view. but the vitriol spewed elsewhere really did for me tbh.

    Stevo you are absolutely and definately WRONG! 🙂

  • Ronwol1960-61🕎⚽🎷🎥 17/08/2018 at 1:18 am

    Freund or Foe
    Honesty Ron, his school was incredible. Full of amazing kids with quite severe issues, but all achieving and moving on in life, and all integrating with the community.
    Thank you so much for your wishes xx

    There is nothing quite like seeing a challenged kid find joy with something they are involved in.
    My stepson who is nearly 40 now,is intellectually challenged (he is brilliant in some ways) he works at a Movie Theatre and when younger was involved in the Special Olympics Ice Hockey. Kids and young men played in leagues in different sports to the best of their abilities. Autistic and down syndrome and other such things but they came together and I used to help as other parents did and you couldnt find better comraderie or love for what they were doing (sometimes at the beginning it was difficult but they then immersed themselves in the culture) It was a joy to see them feel good about what they were doing with devoted coaches etc.
    We played a tournament in Washington DC and the Washington players came out to be with them on the ice for the opening. They were totally in awe of each other.
    There is nothing like seeing joy on the faces of such kids.
    The bestto Jays and his brothers endeavors.

    • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 10:18 am

      Puts it all into perspective

  • Bruxie 17/08/2018 at 7:20 am

    FoF, you are a star dad.
    I’m thinking of all the kids who don’t have this support and who don’t get this much love. One in a million!

  • Bruxie 17/08/2018 at 7:25 am

    A friend sent this to me…
    I would just like to put this out there! If your children are not around special needs children at school and have never been taught that not everyone is the same then maybe you could take 10 min tonight to explain this to them because even though they may not be around these children at school they will encounter them in their lives, as it should be.
    In the light of recent events on the exclusion of a child who has autism from participating in a school trip and a child with Downs Syndrome being kicked out of dance class because she couldn’t keep up, I feel the need to share this. There are boys and girls that nobody invites to birthday parties. There are special kids who want to belong to a team but don’t get selected because it is more important to win than include these children. Children with special needs are not rare or strange, they only want what everyone else wants: to be accepted !!
    For all the wonderful children out there.
    Can I ask a question? Is there anyone willing to copy and paste this post to their wall without sharing it, like I did for those special children out there.
    ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

  • Bardamu 17/08/2018 at 8:25 am

    Wow… What a story, FoF. 😲
    Full respect to you and your family, and what a result!
    Big congrats to your son. ✌
    I’ll definitely chip in to the fund.

  • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 10:12 am

    An uplifting message if ever I read one!
    I will happily make a contribution tonight 😊
    Love ya Fofty ❤️

  • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 10:17 am

    Any idea why this happens?
    Met an old friend of my daughters last Saturday and she has a middle son in the same predicament, her third child she totally refused inoculations for which met with resistance from the local authorities but in the end they relented. She says is in perfect health.
    Makes you wonder….

    • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 10:30 am

      Don’t ignore centuries of research by people far smarter than you or me. It’s not the vax it’s the fact that the condition shows itself at a similar time. Otherwise how were the eldest child and the vast majority of immunized children ok?

      • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 11:05 am

        Your telling me that there are pro far smarter than me??
        😡😡😡😂

        Just putting it out there, some people are highly suspicious of vaccinations.

        • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 11:06 am

          People *

        • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 11:07 am

          They think it’s a “debate”. First evidence of their stupidity and their folly.

          One of the true faces of anti-vax and it’s consequences

          • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 11:20 am

            This is what meningococcal disease can do to an unvaccinated child. Needless to say the parents did not believe in anti-vax after that

            • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 11:55 am

              Met a chiropractor a few years back a Canadian chap who lived in the uk for ten years, him and his wife had a young daughter of about a year old, they moved back to Canada as he was being hassled to get his daughter vaxed and he flat refused, he preferred her chances without the vaccines.

              • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 12:04 pm

                He’s putting all the children his daughter comes into contact at risk too

                • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 12:13 pm

                  Perhaps, to be honest I don’t really understand how or why.
                  🤓

                  • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 12:18 pm

                    Google ‘herd immunity’

                • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 12:44 pm

                  Surely if they have been inoculated they should be okay no?

                  • Superspoz 🏆 17/08/2018 at 12:51 pm

                    I’ve done a bit of research on this subject, the wife even bought a book by Andrew Wakefield ( you’ll have to Google him). This isn’t the platform to discuss this but the fact is there are plenty educated people who don’t agree with some of the “ingredients ” in vaccines.

  • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 11:11 am

    Life expectancy in the UK in the 1700s (pre-vax) was about 35. Life expectancy in the UK today (vax) is 85. That is big jump, and alhough vax is not the only factor, it helps when you don’t die of diseases like measles and chickenpox

  • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 11:58 am

    In other news Steve Bruce said on Talkshite this morning that had Tottenham got in early Grealish would have been a Spurs player 😑

    • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 12:06 pm

      Same old same old. Dembele II would be a Spurs player too

    • Bardamu 17/08/2018 at 12:45 pm

      Bit tough to hear that when I really wanted the lad to join us 😞

      • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 1:31 pm

        Indeed 🤨

  • Bruxie 17/08/2018 at 2:38 pm

    Nice math from TBH on his latest levyjihad…

    Losing it or what?!

    • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 2:44 pm

      Levy jihad 😂😂

    • Matt 17/08/2018 at 3:17 pm

      It’s lucky TBH is such a nice bloke; because he really ain’t the brightest spark (see what I did there?). Of course electricians are getting paid a lot on that site; it’s demand supply economics.

      • Bruxie 17/08/2018 at 3:32 pm

        Apparently if you want a sparky in London, it’s nigh on impossible. They are all on the NWHL site.

    • Fat Bertha 17/08/2018 at 4:49 pm

      Levyjihad! *sniggerz*

  • Bruxie 17/08/2018 at 2:52 pm

    Who’s going tomorrow?

    It’s FOOTBALL again!

    I’ll be in a pub near Wembley if anyone wants to meet!

    • ronwol196061 17/08/2018 at 3:03 pm

      Dembele and Toby?

      • Bruxie 17/08/2018 at 3:07 pm

        If neither are playing they’ll be joining me for a pint or two.

    • Fat Bertha 17/08/2018 at 4:47 pm

      Not me this time, Brux, but looking forward to the next meet. Hopefully Spursy will join us again.

  • Flat Oeuf 17/08/2018 at 3:05 pm

    Lovely post FoF and very happy for you and Jay. Hardly any connection here today but just wanted to say thanks for letting us share in your journey and success. I’ll be putting into the pot.

  • Bruxie 17/08/2018 at 3:06 pm

    Rumours about Edwards going to Bielsa’s Leeds United.
    I hope it’s on loan.
    Bielsa is Poch’s mentor from his playing days and youth football days.
    He could bring the lad to heel.
    Poch probably hoping his guru can do something with the lad.
    Leeds are a force this season.

    • SeattleSpursGuy 17/08/2018 at 3:33 pm

      Recent story about Bielsa: He wanted to know how many hours’ work it took the average Leeds fan to earn the money to watch the team play. After some rough calculations, the answer given to him was three. He then made his players pick up litter from around the club’s training ground for three hours to hammer home just how hard the fans work to be able to buy match tickets.

      Edwards won’t trouble him a bit.

      • Bruxie 17/08/2018 at 3:36 pm

        That’s why I hope it’s a loan deal.
        If Edwards knows that story that will be the end of the deal!
        Good story SSG!

  • SeattleSpursGuy 17/08/2018 at 4:02 pm

    Poch on whether any players will leave this month:

    “Maybe, yes, we are going to see if some players believe that they can achieve their goals in another club. Maybe they are going to move. Different individual things can happen in the next few weeks. If some player is not happy because he needs to play or believes he can play more at another team, or needs to change the environment, or needs a new challenge or motivation, I told them that I am open to find the solution.”

    “I want people who feel happy to be involved here every day, happy to be in the place that the manager, who is the boss, puts you, and I think that is the only way to success.If we are 25 players, 40 or 50 staff, fans, board altogether, working for the same objective, which is to win games. That is why I am so open to fix problems. I don’t want anyone upset or unhappy, or with negative feelings here.”

    “It is so clear the rules. It is so clear my message. I promise I am going to fix it if someone is not happy to be here for the next five months until the transfer window opens again. All people here need to feel they can be part of the team, and help the team any time the manager commands.”

    • Fat Bertha 17/08/2018 at 4:40 pm

      Sounds ominous but I like it. The wife uses the same line on me every couple of months and it’s worked well so far.

  • Bruxie 17/08/2018 at 4:08 pm

    He’s a good man. As well as a good manager.
    No arrogance…tells it like it is.
    You’d want to try your best for a boss like this.

    COYS.

    Where is everybody?

  • Fat Bertha 17/08/2018 at 4:45 pm

    I’m free!

  • SeattleSpursGuy 17/08/2018 at 5:59 pm

    Poch on no signings in the window:

    “Maybe one day I can say: ‘It’s going to be a big mistake [not to sign players], he is going to pay,'” he said. “But then the next day — after two wins against Newcastle and, maybe, Fulham — I say: ‘Keeping the squad together is a massive advantage over a team that signed maybe 10 players.’

    “I love it because you’re not going to remember what you said or what the people said 10 months ago, or five months ago or two months ago. It’s easy to give your opinion freely. I was in a position where I criticised when I finished my playing career.

    “I’d say: ‘He should do this, or the manager that, or this team should do that.’ Because you don’t take decisions, you talk. When you are in my position — and many players that have become managers [are] — then you say: ‘Wow! I never believed it could be as difficult as this.’

    “It’s because of the consequences. When you take a decision the consequences can be positive or negative. The people that give their opinions? They say: ‘Ah, I knew! I knew that was going to happen!’

    “If we win then they’ll say: ‘Tottenham was clever to keep all the players together.’ If we don’t have success they will say: ‘It’s normal, they made a mistake. They didn’t have a deep enough squad.’ But that is football.”

  • SeattleSpursGuy 17/08/2018 at 6:47 pm

    Moose for the win:

    • Superspoz 🏆 17/08/2018 at 7:21 pm

      In the land of the blind the one eyed man is king.

      • Fat Bertha 17/08/2018 at 8:23 pm

        What animals are there in that kingdom? No eye dear.

  • Superspoz 🏆 17/08/2018 at 8:05 pm

    U23’s a man down and a goal down then our ‘mini messi’ equalises. Surely future captain material?

    • 61 Spurs Nut 🌰 17/08/2018 at 8:36 pm

      Seemingly the man for the big occasion, surely Poch should have kept him for Sunday’s game?

      • 61 Spurs Nut 🌰 17/08/2018 at 8:38 pm

        *tomorrow’s

    • SeattleSpursGuy 17/08/2018 at 8:44 pm
      • SeattleSpursGuy 17/08/2018 at 8:59 pm

        A great effort as the boys were down to ten men from the second minute.

        • Sniper 17/08/2018 at 9:02 pm
        • Sniper 17/08/2018 at 9:03 pm

          His little legs move so fast!

  • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 9:04 pm

    Superspoz
    I’ve done a bit of research on this subject, the wife even bought a book by Andrew Wakefield ( you’ll have to Google him). This isn’t the platform to discuss this but the fact is there are plenty educated people who don’t agree with some of the “ingredients ” in vaccines.

    Wakefield was exposed as a fraud. He falsified his results.
    He got struck off and his research debunked. https://www.vox.com/platform/amp/2018/2/27/17057990/andrew-wakefield-vaccines-autism-study

    Sadly you got played. But you weren’t the only one

    • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 9:39 pm

      Even wiki Wakefield and you will get the bare facts. He is a charlatan
      https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andrew_Wakefield

      • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 9:56 pm

        Like Wikipedia is 100% fair and accurate? The sad t

        • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 10:21 pm

          I’m only trying to guide you coz I care mate. You will make your own decisions

          • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 10:27 pm

            Lancet, one of the most respected medical journals in the world discredited his study after initially publishing it.
            https://www.bmj.com/content/342/bmj.c7452
            The British medical council struck him off for serious misconduct arising from his dishonesty writing that paper

            • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 10:30 pm

              I know nothing about this apart that some question vaccines, but i do know that Wikipedia is sometimes incorrect and the Google, Facebook and Twitter is now Liberal biased, fact.

              • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 10:42 pm

                I’m in the medical field, I’m a clinician albeit that is not my area, I’m not affiliated to any drug companies, my kids have every vaccine offered. I’ll stick to known facts on this subject. Like I said I don’t have any interest other than having people avoid the pain that little girl and her parents went through coz of fake science

                • Sniper 18/08/2018 at 3:17 am

                  Do you need to wear gumboots in a medical field?
                  Just checkin’

                  • GDawg 18/08/2018 at 3:33 am

                    Yes. Medical grade

  • Sexy Beast 17/08/2018 at 9:58 pm

    Truth is the internet is untrustworthy in many ways as the narative is often very one sided.

    • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 10:48 pm

      I agree

      • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 11:01 pm

        There are so many information sources you can match one to any viewpoint, credible or not

  • Northern Spur 17/08/2018 at 10:20 pm

    An inspiring and humbling account of triumph over adversity, FoF! I too will make a contribution. Also, do let us know when it’s published, as I’d like to purchase a copy (or two)!

  • GDawg 17/08/2018 at 11:02 pm

    There are so many information sources you can match one to any viewpoint, credible or not

  • Ronwol1960-61🕎⚽🎷🎥 17/08/2018 at 11:51 pm

    I have invented something my friends. Its a Factsimile. Its a machine that just have the facts. No fakesimile is this. It also performs Factinations and is quite honest about the results.

    Look at this one. Tottenham 4 Fulham 1

    • Sniper 18/08/2018 at 3:13 am

      Factinating

  • Ronwol1960-61🕎⚽🎷🎥 17/08/2018 at 11:54 pm

    Sexy Beast
    I know nothing about this apart that some question vaccines, but i do know that Wikipedia is sometimes incorrect and the Google, Facebook and Twitter is now Liberal biased, fact.

    what isnt biased? really. I mean is there anything not biased..like say DONALD TRUMP??????

    • Fat Bertha 18/08/2018 at 2:55 am

      Quack.

      • Sniper 18/08/2018 at 3:17 am

        Misleading

  • Flat Oeuf 18/08/2018 at 7:56 am
  • Spursy 18/08/2018 at 7:49 pm

    Thanks for sharing this, Fofty. I will put something in the pot. I worked for six years in education in this field. I learnt so much and the students were amazing and so were many staff. So glad for your son’s creativity. And your other son supporting. Nice one, matey x

    • Freund or Foe 19/08/2018 at 3:20 pm

      Nice one Spursy, much appreciated x

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